Take Time to Enjoy Life and Keep Busy

Going through a divorce can be extremely painful and cause seemingly unbearable grief. Sometimes it may feel like you will never get past this period of unhappiness and pain.  In time you will.  Try to stay positive and focus on the good things in your life.  This is a new beginning for you.  Devote this time to developing new hobbies and activities that you enjoy and stop dwelling on the past.  What could have been will never be.  Focus on the life ahead of you.  What are some things you have always wanted to do but could never find the time or energy to do? It is also important to take care of your body.  Start walking.  It could improve your mood and your health.  You may also lose weight.  I brought a Richard Simmons’ Sweatin to the Oldies” CD.  His workouts are designed for overweight persons.  The music is upbeat, and the routines are easy to follow.  Richard has been around for decades.  Take a class.  It may be harder to find an onsite class since we are in the middle of a pandemic.  A lot of colleges offer continuing education online classes covering various topics.  Future learn offers free online courses.

 I remember taking a course at a local college in my twenties when I had broken up with my childhood sweetheart of six years.  I was unhappy and needed something to take my mind off the breakup. I took a figure drawing course.  I figured we would be drawing different figures like fruit bowls, trees, etc.  Boy was I wrong. On the first day of class, a lady was sitting on a small stage with a robe.  I didn’t pay her a lot of attention.  As usual, I was in my own little world oblivious to what was about to happen.  All of a sudden, the instructor announced it was time for class to begin.  The lady on the stage stood up and dropped her robe.  My mouth dropped along with the robe.  I was in total surprise.  I looked around and I was the only one in a state of shock.  They were drawing, so I started to draw too.  We had a male model for the next class.  I was clearly the youngest person in the course.  For a while, I was too embarrassed to draw the private parts of the models.  I just shaded the areas in.  It took a while, but I finally got comfortable drawing the entire body of both models.  The class would walk around and critique one another’s work.  Toward the end of the course, everyone was telling me how much I had improved and how good my drawings were.  I had no clue anyone had been paying me much attention.  I ended up enjoying the class and looked forward to attending each week. That was almost 40 years ago.  I still laugh when I think about it. 

If there is a subject you are interested in, buy some books on the topic.  I renewed my interest in dream interpretation and purchased one of the best books I have ever read.  It is entitled “The Divinity Code to Understanding Your Dreams and Visions”. I keep a journal next to my bed to record my dreams upon waking.  It has been said that dreams can give you direction, guidance, and warning.  If there is something that you enjoy doing, think about starting a YouTube video channel and teach others how to do the same thing. You can teach arts and crafts, how to cook various dishes, fashion and beauty, or anything else that you enjoy doing and would like to share with others.  All these ideas are designed to take your mind off the situation at hand, lift your spirits, and help you along the path of healing during and after your divorce.

By Emmerstine Mackie

Divorce Coach