As you are navigating your separation/divorce, remember to be a little selfish and put yourself first.  You have earned the right. Take care of your mental and physical health.  Remember the old saying put the oxygen mask on yourself first before you try to assist others.  Going through a divorce can be extremely painful and cause seemingly unbearable grief. Sometimes it may feel like you will never get past this period of unhappiness and pain.  In time you will. If you are not doing well, it will be difficult for you to assist others.  If you feel overwhelmed with grief and can’t seem to get past it for a prolonged period of time, it may be a good idea to see a therapist or other professional.  It takes time to go through the grieving process.  It is usually estimated to take approximately two years.  In the meantime, concentrate on you.  Bypass quick and temporary fixes such as drugs and/or alcohol.  They bring on more problems in the long run.  You could develop an addiction.  Also, try to avoid getting in a relationship too soon just because you may feel lonely.  These usually end up being rebound relationships and typically don’t last.  Instead try meditation, yoga, exercise, or other things to help you stay calm.  See your doctor on a regular basis.  Do whatever you need to do to make sure you remain mentally and physically fit.  After all, you only have one body and one life to live.  Make the most of it and start enjoying your life.  This is a whole new and exciting beginning. Leave the past in the past where it belongs!  Be like a two-year-old and adopt a me, me attitude.

By Emmerstine Mackie

Divorce Coach

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