Now that you are no longer with your spouse, where do you go from here?  You were a couple and hung out with other couples.  Will they still be your friends now that you are alone?  How do you go about finding new friends?  Will you have enough money to make it on your own?  Do you need a second job or a side gig?  Will you find love again?  Pondering these questions may cause you to be paralyzed with fear. This is normal. Fear of the unknown can sometimes be worse than the unknown itself.  Take the time and make a game plan.  Write down your goals and aspirations.  Assign dates to achieve each element of your plan but allow for deviations.  It helps to see your goals on paper as opposed to in your head.  If you need additional income, start looking for a second job or a side gig.  Don’t think that you are going to find a rich man who will solve all your problems.  If you find one, ask if he has a brother for me!  You may need to find a cheaper place to live or take in a roommate. Once you get things under control, don’t treat life after a separation or divorce as an ending. Instead, treat it as a new beginning. You are still young. Start enjoying yourself. What is it that you have always wanted to do? Now is the time to be selfish and live life on your own terms. Take a class or start a new hobby. Celebrate you!

Emmerstine Mackie

Divorce Coach for the “Seasoned Woman”

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