More on the Pandemic and What it is Doing to Marriages

The pandemic is still having a negative effect on marriages.  Couples tend to argue more and get on each other’s nerves more during times of stress.  The pandemic has certainly caused a lot of stress in relationships.  Couples are bored and tired of looking at one another. This can cause conflict in a marriage.  They are seeing each other every day and all day.  Financial problems are also causing undue stress on relationships.  Surprisingly, newlyweds are having the most difficult time.  It is estimated that 20% of couples married 5 months or less were seeking a divorce. What happened to the honeymoon phase? The increased rate of divorce for this segment is predicted to continue.  Inquiries for divorce has increased by 34% during the pandemic. I understand this since my ex, and I divorced after he retired early.  I was working from home during this time.  Talk about stress!  I did have a few more glasses of wine, but that didn’t help.  So, ladies, I can feel your pain.  All I can say is pray, pray, and pray some more.  This too shall pass. 

Couples are realizing that they have less in common than they initially thought.  Remember the old saying, “opposites attract.” Spending extended time together with your spouse makes you question this saying.  My ex and I were opposites.  He was strong where I was weak, and I was strong where he was weak.  Together we had most of the bases covered.  In the end, it was our differences that tore us apart.  This was especially after spending considerable time together once he retired.  Calls to the Domestic Violence Hotline have increased. Mental health issues have also become a problem during the pandemic.  This has happened because couples are forced into isolation together.  Anxiety and depression have become major issues.  No, you can’t say he was always crazy, and Corona just brought it out!  Couples are spending extended periods together.  This can be hell when you are not used to it. It has been predicted that this trend will continue throughout the pandemic. It has also been reported that the use of alcohol and drugs are up.  Couples are turning to substance abuse as a means to cope with the stress of the pandemic.  Put the bottle down and say a prayer!  Your spouse will still be there when you sober up!    Now don’t try to kill him.  Remember, you said until death do we part, and this does not include murder.  Don’t try to make it look like an accident.  Believe me, you will be caught.  He is probably tired of being around you 24/7 also. 

For the seasoned women 50 and older, you probably don’t have the added stress of having to homeschool children.  Say a prayer and be grateful.  My hats off to the younger woman dealing with this on top of being isolated together with their spouse. These women are probably some of the people that have caused alcohol sales to spike.  Trust me, I understand.  Now, ladies, I know some of you can be difficult to get along with too.  I know, say it ain’t so!  Some of you are saying, “I am a joy to be with.”  My thoughts exactly.  But be real, this is not always the case.  My mother always said, “nobody’s perfect, we all have our faults.” So, try to be more understanding of your spouse as you navigate this pandemic together. Try to get counseling if you think your marriage can be saved. If not, then plan your exit.  He may be already planning his.  Don’t be caught off guard.  If you need a divorce coach, and you may, due to the current pandemic, sign up for a free consultation.  Let me help you thru the process.  You don’t have to go it alone. I can coach you.  Always be prepared for the unexpected.

By Emmerstine Mackie

Divorce Coach for the Seasoned Woman